In this week’s episode of Disability Matters, host Patrick O’Donnell and John Comiskey spoke with Virgé Connery, Clinical Director and founder of Behaviour Detectives, for a thoughtful and wide-ranging conversation about behavioural psychology, autism, learning new skills, and supporting both children and adults to live more independent and confident lives.
Founded in 2017, Behaviour Detectives grew from Virgé’s own private practice as her caseload expanded beyond what one person could manage. The name itself reflects the heart of the work.
“You become a detective,” Virgé explained. “You have to figure out what’s going on, why something is happening, and what a person is trying to communicate through their behaviour.”
Behaviour Is More Than “Challenging Behaviour”
A central message of the interview was that behaviour analysis is often misunderstood.
While many people associate it only with aggression or “challenging behaviour”, Virgé stressed that behaviour includes:
- Learning new skills
- Communication
- Self-management
- Independent living
- Social interaction
“We behave every day. Behaviour is how we learn, how we adapt, and how we live.”
Importantly, she rejected the idea that teaching new skills changes who a person is.
“Teaching someone a new skill doesn’t change who they are. You’re still you. You’re just more able.”
Autism as a Broad Spectrum of Experience
Much of Behaviour Detectives’ work supports people with autism, but Virgé emphasised that diagnosis is not a requirement for support.
Autism, she explained, is an extremely broad spectrum:
- Some people use language easily
- Some are non-verbal communicators
- Some appear very independent but struggle deeply with anxiety, isolation and sensory overload
She described young people who are afraid to leave the house, or who avoid visitors because social interaction feels overwhelming.
“Just because someone can speak doesn’t mean they struggle any less.”
There Is No Single Cause of Autism
Drawing on her years lecturing with University College Cork, Virgé explained that there is no single cause of autism.
Research points to many possible influences:
- Genetics
- Biology
- Environment
But no clear or single explanation exists.
Rather than focusing on causes, she argued, the priority should be support.
“If someone is unhappy with something in their life, then we should try to help them work on it.”
All Behaviour Is Communication
One of the most powerful themes of the interview was that all behaviour is communication.
Virgé gave a simple example of a child calling a parent quietly, being ignored, and gradually shouting louder and louder until finally being noticed.
“By accident, we shape the shouting behaviour — because the quieter communication was never acknowledged.”
Over time, small patterns can become deeply ingrained, especially when families are under pressure, exhausted, or managing multiple demands.
“Parents always want the best. But life shapes behaviour in ways we don’t always notice.”
Working With Children, Adults and Families
Behaviour Detectives works with:
- Young children
- Teenagers
- Adults in their 20s and beyond
Virgé described the privilege of supporting adults who actively seek help to build independence — learning to take a bus, go for a walk alone, or manage social interaction.
“It’s never too late to learn a new skill.”
She also highlighted how transitions — from school to adulthood, from dependence to independence — can be especially difficult for people with additional needs.
Modern life, she noted, makes transitions even more complex, with extended “emerging adulthood” and fewer clear pathways.
Supporting Parents as Well as Children
A major part of Behaviour Detectives’ work is supporting parents.
Virgé spoke movingly about how parents of children with additional needs often feel:
- Overwhelmed
- Exhausted
- Guilty
- Like they have failed
“Parenting a child with additional needs is not the same as parenting a typical child.”
Rather than “parenting courses”, Behaviour Detectives developed Positive Behaviour Skills Training, focusing on practical psychological skills rather than judging parenting.
“You’re an amazing parent. You’re just not a psychologist — and that’s okay.”
Working Across Homes, Schools and Communities
All referrals to Behaviour Detectives come through HSE and Tusla.
The team works across:
- Homes
- Schools
- Residential settings
- Community services
Virgé explained that you cannot isolate behaviour to one setting.
If school is difficult, it affects home.
If respite breaks down, the whole family is impacted.
That is why much of their work happens in people’s own environments, where real-life challenges can be observed and supported.
Growing a National Team
From a team of four, Behaviour Detectives has grown to nearly 20 staff, with offices in:
- Kilkenny
- Kildare
- Dublin
The organisation also supports psychology students and graduates, helping to build clear career pathways in a profession where training routes are often complex.
“Quality, governance and standards are everything. I’ll never drop my standards.”
How to Get in Touch
Behaviour Detectives welcomes referrals and enquiries through:
🌐 Website: www.behaviourdetectives.ie
📧 Email: hello@behaviourdetectives.ie
“It’s never too late to learn. With the right support, people can build skills, confidence and independence at any stage of life.”
This interview aired on Disability Matters with Patrick O’Donnell and John Comiskey on 92.5 Phoenix FM, a programme produced by Blanchardstown Centre for Independent Living (BCIL).
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