One ordinary working day in 2018 changed Michele Roys life forever.
A successful international executive who had worked across four continents, a mother of two and someone who thrived on achievement, Michele suddenly experienced excruciating facial pain that doctors initially feared was a stroke. Instead, she would begin a long and difficult journey through chronic illness, eventually being diagnosed with Trigeminal Neuralgia, Fibromyalgia, and later Lyme Disease.
Speaking with John Comiskey on Disability Matters, Michele shared an emotional and inspiring story about resilience, faith and discovering purpose in the middle of unimaginable pain.
“It felt like somebody was cutting my face open.”
Before illness, Michele describes herself as someone who never stopped.
“My life was very fast-paced. I worked in ten countries across four continents. I was a high achiever, a mother of two, always moving, always working.”
Everything changed in an instant.
“I was sitting at my desk when suddenly it felt like somebody was literally cutting my face open with a knife. There was burning, electric shock pain, ringing in my ears and dizziness. The pain was unbearable.”
Initially treated as a suspected stroke, further investigations eventually revealed Trigeminal Neuralgia—often described as one of the most painful conditions known to medicine.
Michele explained that the condition affects the trigeminal nerve, responsible for sensation in the face.
“It’s often called the suicide disease because the pain can be so severe. Every movement—even brushing your teeth, brushing your hair or the wind touching your face—can trigger unbearable pain.”
Unlike many patients, Michele developed the condition on both sides of her face, making it even more complex.
After four and a half years, scans finally showed that an artery was pressing against both trigeminal nerves.
One Diagnosis Became Three
As if Trigeminal Neuralgia were not enough, Michele’s body began developing widespread pain only weeks after her initial diagnosis.
Doctors eventually diagnosed Fibromyalgia, causing severe muscle pain, fatigue and cognitive difficulties.
Later still, blood tests sent to Germany confirmed Lyme Disease, likely contracted years earlier after hiking.
“I joke that I just kept collecting diagnoses,” Michele said with remarkable humour. “But each one taught me something about resilience.”
The illnesses completely transformed her life.
“I went from someone who never stopped working to barely being able to get out of bed. I lost the energy, the cognitive ability, and the person I thought I was.”
The Reality of Invisible Disability
One of the strongest themes throughout the interview was the challenge of living with conditions that others cannot see.
“People say, ‘But you look fine.’ That’s probably one of the hardest parts.”
Michele explained that invisible disabilities often leave people feeling misunderstood.
“Sometimes I actually wish people could see the pain, because then maybe they’d understand.”
She recalled arriving at an airport, exhausted after travelling from home with severe pain, only to be questioned when requesting disability assistance.
“The staff member asked me, ‘Are you sure you need it?’ I just burst into tears.”
Her experience highlights why greater public awareness of invisible disabilities is so important.
Small Wins Build Great Resilience
Rather than allowing illness to define her, Michele gradually learned to rebuild her life one small step at a time.
“Getting out of bed became my first achievement. Then making my bed. Then getting dressed.”
Those seemingly ordinary tasks became powerful milestones.
“Small wins build resilience. When you look back, you realise you’ve already overcome so much.”
She believes resilience is not something people are born with—it grows through everyday victories.
Writing Her Way Through Grief
Unable to return to her previous career, Michele began journaling as a way of coping with the enormous grief that accompanies life-changing illness.
Those journals eventually became her award-winning memoir, But You Look Just Fine.
“Writing became therapy.”
The book took four years to complete and has since won the International Impact Book Award.
More importantly, it has connected with readers living with invisible illnesses.
“People tell me, ‘Now I can give your book to my doctor or my family so they understand what living with chronic pain is really like.'”
Michele believes writing helped reconnect her mind and body after years of trauma.
“I realised I wasn’t going back to the person I used to be—and that’s okay. We can create a beautiful new version of ourselves.”
Turning Pain into Purpose
Michele refused to let illness end her ability to make a difference.
She now hosts The Michele Roy Show, interviewing experts and people with inspiring life stories every week.
She is also an international speaker, using her background in leadership and human resources to help employers better understand invisible disabilities in the workplace.
“People with chronic illness still have talents. They still have so much to give. What they need is understanding and reasonable support.”
She encourages organisations to look beyond appearances.
“If someone tells you they’re struggling, believe them.”
Michele also serves as a Pain Awareness Ambassador with the Facial Pain Association in the United States, raising awareness of Trigeminal Neuralgia worldwide.
One of her current goals is to see buildings across Ireland illuminated in teal each October for Facial Pain Awareness Month.
Faith as Her Foundation
Throughout the interview, Michele spoke openly about the importance of her Christian faith.
“I couldn’t do this without God.”
She described faith as the source of her resilience.
“God gives me the grace for every battle. I don’t depend on my own strength anymore.”
Rather than asking why illness happened, Michele focuses on how her experience can help others.
“If my pain can become someone else’s hope, then it has purpose.”
A Message of Hope
Michele ended the interview with a message for anyone living with chronic illness or disability.
“You are not alone.”
Although pain remains part of her daily life, she chooses to focus on hope rather than limitations.
“Joy and pain can exist together. Even on difficult days, we can still choose hope.”
Her story is a powerful reminder that disability does not define a person’s worth, and that even the deepest suffering can become a source of compassion, strength and purpose for others.
More information: instagram.com/michroys/, facebook.com, micheleroys.com.
This interview aired on Disability Matters on 92.5 Phoenix FM, a programme produced by Blanchardstown Centre for Independent Living (BCIL).
Tune in to Disability Matters Thursdays at 4PM | Repeats: Mon 3AM, Tue 3AM & 7AM | Also available on Mixcloud and on bcil.ie/radio.
Compiled by Valentyna Hordiichuk